I SPENT YESTERDAY IN HELL.
That’s what I had to write about.
It’s kinda like writing a travel piece about Bora-Bora, another place I’ve never been.
At one point in the day I was absolutely surrounded by stacks of books.
On my desk. On the coffee tray. Covering the magazine rack. Scattered all over the floor.
Since I had never been to hell, I thought that the least I should do is read what others who have never been to hell had to say about it.
As a general rule, they used a lot of words to say not much.
And a fair amount of what they said sounded whacked.
By “they” I mean Bible scholars.
Let me give you an example.
One theological doctor dude tried to answer this criticism: Hell makes no sense because it has no redeeming value.
In the Bible, God punished people to steer them or others out of harm’s way. So the punishment had a redeeming purpose. But what’s the redeeming value of putting KC Masterpiece barbecue sauce on someone and cooking them for the rest of forever?
[Product placement note to KC Masterpiece: email me and I’ll tell you where to send the check if you promise not to tell me where to go.]
The doctor dude’s response went something like this: Hell satisfies the justice of God and shows how great and fearful his standard of holiness is.
Clearly, the doctor dude was shooting blanks. Or he shot me in one ear and it came out the other without contacting anything of substance.
At one point in the research I stopped, looked out the window into the sky, and said, “You know, you really ought to tell us what’s going on.”
Christians have so many views about hell that the research leaves my head spinning.
Whatever hell is, I know I don’t want to be there.
Beyond that, do I need to know anything else about it?
I wonder if that’s why God doesn’t bother to tell us what’s going on.