• Skip to main content
  • Skip to header right navigation
  • Skip to site footer

Stephen M. Miller

Award-Winning, Bestselling Christian Author

  • Home
  • About
  • Books
  • Blog Features
  • Bible
  • Contact
Painting/photo of Jerusalem Temple-Casual English Bible

Friends: The ups and downs of having them

Stephen M. Miller
young girl with hands on cheeks
BUMMED. Sometimes it’s hard to tell if someone is sad because they don’t have a friend, or because they do. Photo by D Sharon Pruitt, Pink Sherbet Photography / flickr.

“Jonathan and David became close friends. Jonathan loved David just as he loved himself.” 1 Samuel 18:1 NIRV

WOULDN’T IT BE NICE if that’s how friendship always worked.

Here’s the sad fact of life: having a close friend is not always an uplifting experience.

A friend can suck the life force right out of you.

Consider two best friends I know, sixth-grade girls. I’m going to let you read an authentic letter that one girl wrote to the other, but I’m going to change their names since I want to live.

Here’s the background. The letter writer, whom I’ll sardonically call Frieda Holler, has invited her girlfriend Anna to attend a sleep-over birthday party with about half a dozen other preteen girls. Anna, however, has already accepted a previous invitation to the sleep-over of another friend, Gloria Hummel.

Anna has never spent the night at Gloria’s home, has been looking forward to the party for weeks, and has resisted pressure from both Frieda and Frieda’s mother to bow out of the other party. Frieda has even reminded Anna that it’s Frieda’s mom, not Gloria’s, who often drives both girls to school so they won’t have to ride the overcrowded school bus. To no avail.

Resigned to Anna’s decision, or maybe in a last desperate attempt at persuasion, Frieda writes this letter. I haven’t corrected any misspellings or the bizarre punctuation because this letter is a masterpiece of authenticity and emotion. And I’m not touching it.

Dear Anna,
You and I’s friendship is over! Your not invited to my birthday party! By the way I wasn’t trying to break you and Gloria Hummel up. I don’t know what I did to you for me to deserve this! You don’t know how much you hurt me! I wasn’t trying to do anything to hurt you! You and I weren’t meant to be friends. You need to start to get your own ride to school, even if that means you riding the bus! Gloria Hummel is nice, but she considers me as a snob! She’s not one of my best friends, she’s not really even my friend, but sometimes I wish she were! I’m sorry! (but I think you need to start to respect me for who I am!) I’m really not trying to be rude! But if you think I am I’m not! I’m just trying to make a point! I don’t like the way you are treating me! I know you don’t know what I’m talking about but if you do, you know where I’m coming from! Please don’t takes this badley!! I’m sorry but it’s not going to work out! Good Bye!
Your ex-best friend, Frieda Holler.
P.S. Please, we may not make up, but until we do, you will not hear from me and please don’t call!

Though the postscript seems to strip away all possibility of restoring the friendship, Anna is a smart little cookie who wasn’t about to lose her friend, let alone her ride to school with winter approaching.

The two worked out a compromise. Anna spent the early evening feasting and frolicking with Frieda and friends, then Anna’s mom shuttled her to Gloria’s bash. Happy ending. And happy birthday Frieda.

Compromise is what it takes to be a friend, at least friends for the long haul.

Adapted from How to Live in the Moment.

Share this:

  • Click to share on LinkedIn (Opens in new window) LinkedIn
  • Click to share on Pinterest (Opens in new window) Pinterest

Like this:

Like Loading...
View All Posts - Ordered by Most Recent First
« Previous
Next »

About Stephen M. Miller

STEPHEN M. MILLER is an award winning bestselling Christian author of easy-reading books about the Bible and Christianity and author of the Casual English Bible® paraphrase. His books have sold over two million copies and include The Complete Guide to the Bible and Who’s and Where’s Where in the Bible.

Reader Interactions

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Sidebar

Casual English Bible Website

Featured Book

Complete Guide to the Bible

Complete Guide to the Bible
Buy from Amazon
Buy from Books-A-Million
Buy from Christian Book Distributor
Buy from Google Play

Latest Posts

  • I do one thing better than God May 27, 2025
  • When our faith glitches May 5, 2025
  • Job is the right book for me now April 16, 2025

  • Home
  • About
  • Blog Features
  • Books
  • Contact
  • Privacy Policy

  • YouTube
  • Instagram
  • LinkedIn

Copyright © 2025 · Stephen M. Miller · All Rights Reserved

Privacy & Cookies: This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this website, you agree to their use. To find out more, including how to control cookies, see here: Cookie Policy
Reject AllAccept All
Manage consent

Privacy Overview

This website uses cookies to improve your experience while you navigate through the website. Out of these, the cookies that are categorized as necessary are stored on your browser as they are essential for the working of basic functionalities of the website. We also use third-party cookies that help us analyze and understand how you use this website. These cookies will be stored in your browser only with your consent. You also have the option to opt-out of these cookies. But opting out of some of these cookies may affect your browsing experience.
Necessary
Always Enabled
Necessary cookies are absolutely essential for the website to function properly. These cookies ensure basic functionalities and security features of the website, anonymously.
CookieDurationDescription
cookielawinfo-checkbox-analytics11 monthsThis cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Analytics".
cookielawinfo-checkbox-functional11 monthsThe cookie is set by GDPR cookie consent to record the user consent for the cookies in the category "Functional".
cookielawinfo-checkbox-necessary11 monthsThis cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookies is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Necessary".
cookielawinfo-checkbox-others11 monthsThis cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Other.
cookielawinfo-checkbox-performance11 monthsThis cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Performance".
viewed_cookie_policy11 monthsThe cookie is set by the GDPR Cookie Consent plugin and is used to store whether or not user has consented to the use of cookies. It does not store any personal data.
Functional
Functional cookies help to perform certain functionalities like sharing the content of the website on social media platforms, collect feedbacks, and other third-party features.
Performance
Performance cookies are used to understand and analyze the key performance indexes of the website which helps in delivering a better user experience for the visitors.
Analytics
Analytical cookies are used to understand how visitors interact with the website. These cookies help provide information on metrics the number of visitors, bounce rate, traffic source, etc.
Advertisement
Advertisement cookies are used to provide visitors with relevant ads and marketing campaigns. These cookies track visitors across websites and collect information to provide customized ads.
Others
Other uncategorized cookies are those that are being analyzed and have not been classified into a category as yet.
SAVE & ACCEPT
%d